Deaf Pig Roast (DPR)

First of all, let me answer the question on your mind. No, the pig was not deaf! It was an event held in Williambsburg last weekend for the Deaf in our Virginia communities. Deaf families from all over come together with one common link: someone in their family is Deaf. This could be a mom, dad, son, daughter, sister, brother. It didn't matter. What mattered most was that everyone understood the challenges one faces being deaf or having a loved one who is deaf.

I have been married for almost 20 years now, and although my husband, Ken, is deaf he was mainstreamed in the public school. This being said, he never really considered himself Deaf. He does wear a hearing aid to help him catch some of what is going on around him, but without it he is completely deaf.

In the past year at GLCC the deaf ministry has opened up a new world to him; one that he was not seeking. He has since connected with old friends from his childhood; many of which were at the DPR. They are on Facebook chat and text regularly. Technology has opened up their world of communication. TV shows like "Switched at Birth" let hearing people understand the challenges of the Deaf better.

A poem was posted on FB recently that I would like to share. Perhaps you will gain a better understanding from Dianne Kinnee (Switras) the Deaf person's perspective...

What is it like to be deaf?

"What is it like to be deaf?"
People have asked me.
Deaf? Oh, hmmm...how do I explain that?
Simple: I can't hear.

No, wait...it is much more than that.
It is similar to a goldfish in a bowl,
Always observing things going on.
People talking at all times.
It is like a man on his own island
Among foreigners.

Isolation is no stranger to me.
Relatives say hi and bye
But I sit for 5 hours among them
Taking great pleasure at amusing babies
Or being amused by TV.
Reading books, resting, helping out with food.

Natural curiosity perks up
Upon seeing a great laughter, crying, anger.
Inquiring only to meet with a "never mind" or
"Oh, it's not important."
Getting a summarized statement
Of the whole day.

I'm supposed to smile to show my happiness.
Little do they know how truly miserable I am.
People are in control of language usage,
I am at loss and really uncomfortable!

Always feeling like an outsider
Among the hearing people,
Even though it was not their intention.

Always assuming that I am part of them
By my physical presence, not understanding
The importance of communication.

Facing the choice between Deaf Event weekend
or a family reunion.
Facing the choice between family commitment
And Deaf friends.
I must make the choices constantly,
Any wonder why I choose Deaf friends???

I get such great pleasure at the Deaf clubs,
Before I realize it, it is already 2:00 am,
Whereas I anxiously look at the clock
Every few minutes at the Family reunion.

With Deaf people, I feel so normal,
Our communication flows back and forth.
Catch up with little trivials, our daily life,
Our frustration in the bigger world,
Seeking the mutual understanding,
Contented smiles and laughter are musical.
So magical to me,
So attuned to each other's feelings.

True happiness is important.
I feel more at home with Deaf people.
Of various color, religion, short or tall
Than I do among my own hearing relatives.
And you wonder why?
Our language is common.
We understand each other.

Being at loss of control
Of the environment that is communication,
People panic and retreat to avoid
Deaf people like the plague.

But Deaf people are still human beings
With dreams, desires, the needs
To belong, just like everyone else.

I am encouraged by the ASL sign language classes being offerred at GLCC and those in the community for the children attending Coles Elementary School.

When you visit our home you will most likely see sign language. Our children are learning it and my husband is no longer ashamed to have to use it to communicate better. After all, communication is the key to any relationship. I am the "ears" for one who cannot hear. I have to remember that it is important to Ken that I relay as best as possible the things happening around him so that he doesn't feel left out.

We are planning to attend the DPR again next year. It was truly wonderful to be able to communicate with my Deaf friends and to be accepted in their "world."

Boulders In Our Path

Several years ago, my dear husband suggested we climb Old Rag. I like the outdoors as much as the next person and I like a good hike, but I was intimidated at the thought of this particular hike. My teaching assistant, years before, had come back with a sprained ankle, scrapes all down her side, and an arm in a sling. But, like the good wife I try to be, I said sure let's go and so we went.

The initial part of the hike was fine, a steep little walk up a leafy hillside, making me wonder what all the fuss was about. I must be some kind of superwoman since this was a piece of cake! How silly of me and how premature the celebration. We soon came to the most challenging bits and I found myself many times wanting to stop, to go back the way we'd come, maybe even call in mountain rescue to airlift me down. For me, it was that bad.

Boulders were everywhere. I mean honking big old boulders that towered over everyone and everything, jumbled up on top of each other like building blocks. They were fun to go around and a little challenging to climb over the smaller ones, but soon we came to a mammoth mountain of several together and the trail went straight up between them. Adding to the challenge was the slippery sides made even more slippery by hundreds of wet sneakers traveling up and over.

I didn't want to do it. I couldn't do it. I wasn't strong enough and I wasn't limber enough and I was scared out of my mind. I stood in the snaky little line waiting for my turn to make the attempt, dreading the humiliation when all of the spectators realized the thing I already knew. I was a miserable failure and a total schlub at hiking with the big boys.

A handful of Boy Scouts went up in front of me and another handful were directly behind me. Even worse, I thought....humiliated in front of 10 year olds. I approached the ginormous rock and looked up at the impossible height and then I noticed something new. The scouts in front of me were on top and they and their leader were holding out their hands to me. I clasped the offered hands then realized that the ones behind me were shoving with all their might from the back and between all of the helpers and my own strength, I was up....up and over!!! I wasn't even embarrassed that little Boy Scout hands had been shoving the rump of a strange lady hiker! With their help, I had done it and it felt GOOD!

Sometimes we feel like our life is strewn with giant boulders and there is no way, absolutely no way we will EVER get over or around. We may have been standing at the base for a long time, despondent and discouraged, and utterly without hope. That boulder is not moving and we're stuck. The thing is, I didn't see help until I looked up. I looked up and saw the outstretched hand willing to help me in my climb and right then, it became possible.

Are you in front of a boulder? Have you just about given up hope? Have you looked up? Take the hand that Jesus offers and let Him help you move past it. I can promise you....it will feel GOOD!

Finding the Positives in a Negative Situation

A few weeks ago, my mom came into my room and informed me of some issues that were going on with my family in Florida. After she left, I sat there and thought deeply about what was going on. I wondered to myself whether I should ask my family if they wanted me to go down there to be with them and help out or if I should just keep my distance unless one of them contacted me first. Well, sure enough, a few days later my mom told me my aunt had called and asked for us to go down and help out with things.

My cousin is a mother of 2 year old twins and was unable to pay for child care. Everyone else in the family down there worked during the day, so my mom and I took care of the kids while everyone was at work.

As many may know, 2 year olds are sometimes referred to as "Terrible Twos" for a reason. And while these kids are usually sweet and loving, there are those few times that I just wanted to rip my hair out! But instead of losing my cool, I learned to be patient with them and I reminded myself that they were only 2 years old and they are still figuring things out.

Under the unfortunate circumstances that drew my mom and I down to Florida, there were some positive things that came out of the whole ordeal. I was able to spend some one-on-one time with my cousin and create some fun memories with her and just talk about life with her. After going to lunch, walking 4 miles on the beach (accidentally!), and getting mani/pedis together we found out a lot about each other and how alike we are.

One of the events that really stood out for me while I was down there was when my aunt and I took the kids to the doctor. In order for them to be able to go to daycare, they needed to get a few shots. I was holding one of them while my aunt held the other. I was expecting a full out battle while the shots were being administered to them, but surprisingly it wasn't until the last couple shots that they cried and even then, they only cried for maybe a minute. I have never been that proud of anybody before. They both very much deserved those stickers they got as we left the doctor's office.

I usually only get to see these kids a couple times a year so being able to spend 2 weeks with them was really nice and lots of fun. From watching Spongebob to building towers out of blocks, I enjoyed spending so much time with them. They each have very different personalities and they both made me laugh a lot during my visit there. I love them both very much.

I feel truly blessed that I was able to go down and be there for my family. After dealing with all the ups and downs of high school and gains and losses of friends, I have found that my family is the most important thing in the world. I'm glad I was able to help out and support my family the past couple of weeks. I know if the situation was reversed they would do the same thing for me as well.

98 Cents and a Lesson in Attitude

I was starving, absolutely starving. 8 months pregnant and finishing up my day of teaching and I was ravenously looking for food. None to be had in my classroom, none to be had in my car, so I decided to stop on the 30 minute ride home and get myself something. The only problem was that I didn't have any money. This was in the days before debit cards or ATMs (yes, I'm showing my age), so when a girl had 97 cents, she had 97 cents. The end.

So, I took my 97 cents and drove to the nearby Roy Rogers and thought, "Surely I can buy a biscuit, or a small fry. Something HAS to be under a dollar." I went inside and looked at the brightly lit menu, but everything on it was more than I had. Waahhh....I was so hungry I could have eaten the cash register! The lady behind it stepped up and asked if she could help me and I said, "What can I get here for 97 cents?" Pregnant, tired, drooping after a long day spent with 6th graders, I must have looked pitiful and wretched and that caused her to do something that surprised me.

Looking around her furtively, she grabbed a small bag, put two pieces of chicken and a biscuit in it and very quietly gave it to me with a wave of her hand. She wanted no money, not even my paltry 97 cents! I couldn't believe it and I also didn't know what to do. I immediately thought she'd be in trouble that I would be the cause of it, but she shooed my out of the door and I took my gifted chicken and hit the road. I believe to this day, that was the best chicken I've even eaten and I have never forgotten the risk that lady took to help someone who was hungry. More about this in a minute.....

Fast forward a few years and I am at a different Roy Rogers in a different town and I have my two oldest boys in the car. They were just little tykes at the time and after picking them up from daycare, I promised them I'd buy each a milkshake. Yay.....Mommy is the best!!! Wonderful times until we pulled up to the window to pay and I found out we were a penny short. The lady in the window was practicing for her role as prison matron, or something equally mean, because there was no mercy. Again, this was before debit cards so what you had was what you had. And I didn't have a penny.

"I'm sorry, but I can't let you have the shakes until I have that penny," she said. So, I let the boys get out of their car seats and they went all over that car looking for any sticky penny that might have fallen or been wedged into a crack. Nothing...nada....zero. By this time, I was humiliated and the boys were hopeless and those milkshakes were going to have to be left on the counter as we drove away. But, last minute she says, "All right, just take the milkshakes and go!" I left, feeling so guilty over one penny...guilty and embarrassed to the extreme.

I've wondered over the years whether the first lady did right in giving me something that I had not paid for. I was, after all, an accessory to a crime, and chicken stealer was not how I wanted to be known. What I do remember and always will, was the compassion with which that lady helped me. She saw a need, a very obvious one, and did what she thought was right. I'll remember her and her kind face always.

On the other hand, the lady who demanded the penny will be with me always, too, as a reminder of how I can get hung up on the little things. Is my need to control keeping me from seeing others with eyes of compassion or tenderness? I don't want to be the lady who sends others away humiliated.

98 cents is not much money, but in the long run, it has provided me with a priceless education in compassion.

Shake Off That Dirt!

This is a great old story that I changed into a Christian viewpoint. It is indeed true that God helps us rise in adversity. I hope you enjoy the new version.

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The donkey cried for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. He came to the decision that the animal was old and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth the effort to retrieve the donkey.


All the neighbors came to help shovel the dirt into the well. At first the donkey cried out in fear as the dirt began to hit his back. Then suddenly the donkey become quiet.


After a few more shovels of dirt had been tossed into the well, the farmer stopped to look into the well. To his surprise, he noticed that with each load of dirt the donkey would shake it off, pat it on the ground, and take a step up.


As the farmer and neighbors continued to shovel the dirt, the donkey continued the process: Shake off the dirt, pat it down, take a step up. Pretty soon to everyone's amazement the donkey stepped up and over the rim of the well and happily trotted off.


MORAL: Life is going to shovel all kinds of dirt on you. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off, pat it down, and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a stepping stone. We can get out of the deepest wells by looking up, trusting God for an answer, and never giving up.



REMEMBER:

Free your heart from hatred - forgive.

Free your mind from worries - God recommends it.

Live simply and appreciate what you have - be content.

Give more - use whatever talents you have.

Expect less from people - and more from God.

Proverbs 3: 5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight." NIV

The Plan

“The best laid plans of mice and men..." – how many times have you heard that phrase? (Ever notice how we often don’t finish that phrase? We just leave it with the dot, dot, dot hanging out there. Did you know the rest of phrase is “gang aft agley”? And now you know why we don’t finish the phrase. In normal English, we usually translate it as “often go astray” because Robert Burns was writing in some weird, crazy English. Actually, the line was “the best-laid schemes o’ mice an’ men,” but I’m getting way off track here.)

So, the best laid plans often go astray. There are many times in my life when I feel like that’s one of the most absolute truths in the world. Take for instance a little adventure my mother, friend, and I had last weekend – as many of you know, we were walking in the Komen 3-Day for the Cure, a 3-day-long walk to help raise money and awareness for breast cancer research. Well, let me tell ya, it did not go as planned. Aside from rain, nasty port-a-potties, and a swampy campsite, we also had multiple injuries, sickness and lost luggage. We weren’t even able to walk all 3 days. Not even close to our plan! We had planned on having a fun and enjoyable weekend. We knew the walk might be hard and a little wet, but we really thought we were going to have a great time; instead we ended the weekend feeling a bit like failures, disappointed and discouraged.

Another phrase I hear a lot is,“If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans.” Is that really how it works? Is God up there waiting to see what we’re hoping for just so He can squash our dreams and do it His way? Because, really, what was so wrong with our plan? Is health and safety really so against God’s will?

What about other plans? What about planning to get the laundry done over the weekend, or getting to work on time, or a home-cooked meal? What about the woman who planned on being a mother, but has lost multiple children in miscarriages? What about the man who planned on providing for his family, but lost his job to a bad economy? No one plans for cancer to enter their life. No one plans to have a car accident leave them paralyzed. No one plans on taking care of a loved-one after Alzheimer’s has robbed their mind. Most people plan on good things but often get detoured by the bad things.

I really don’t think we serve a God who delights in ruining our plans, but it can be so hard to understand when His plan doesn’t match up with ours. Sometimes, if we’re lucky enough, we figure out what God’s intention was and why His plan was better than ours, but other times we never really know. I have to be honest – I really hate that.

It seems like everything I struggle with keeps coming back to trust. Do I trust that God has the best plan for my life? Personally, I planned on big things – I wanted to be the first bestselling novelist to win an Olympic gold medal, a Grammy and an Oscar. That has not happened and, sadly, it’s looking more and more like it never will. ;-) I said earlier that the “best laid plans” quote sometimes seemed like an absolute truth, but the real truth is this: God knows the plans He has for us – plans to prosper us and not to harm us, plans to give us a hope and a future (paraphrase of Jeremiah 29:11). Seems like a pretty good plan to me.

I'm Trading My Sorrows

Imagine yourself, hands thrown high, trading your sorrows for joy. God would like to do that for you. Listen to this beautiful song and lift your hands and let go.

Download this mp3 from Beemp3.com